Forgiving Others to Build Relationships

A gift is defined as a thing given willingly to someone without payment. Christmas is a time to give gifts to those in our lives. We spend a great deal of time picking out and buying the perfect gift. As I completed my shopping this past weekend, I thought about the gifts that can’t be purchased but are the best gifts we could ever give to someone.


There are several non-tangible gifts we can give to others and one of those is the gift of forgiveness. Here’s a recap of our blog on Practicing Forgiveness.


Why Forgiving is Important


In life, people are not always nice. Sometimes it is by choice and sometimes it’s not. Our gut response to any type of pain, emotional or physical, is to protect ourselves. On the emotional level, this can be exhibited as placing blame, trying to get even or just carrying around a slow burning anger toward another person. Overtime, this negative energy affects us physically, emotionally and even spiritually.


In Buddhism, they compare the action of not forgiving others as holding onto hot coals to throw at someone else. This is a perfect analogy in my eyes. Who is going to hurt more? Plus, this puts serious stress on us mentally. To be unforgiving can cause hormonal imbalances and depletion of the chemicals we need to be happy. This long-term stress impacts our immune system and cardiovascular system thus shortening our lives.


How to Forgive Others


All of us have been hurt at some point in our lives, and while it’s difficult to forgive, here are a few tips to help you get started:


  1. Forgive someone as a gift to yourself and not as a gift to him or her. I think this is one of the most important things you can do. It will free you from the control you have given to that individual over your health and happiness. While this sounds a bit selfish, by releasing them you are letting go and not dwelling in the past. You can move forward and live a life of peace and happiness.


  1. Write it down. This is private and you can really let go of all the negative energy that has been created within yourself. This especially works if you no longer have contact with the person because of death or estrangement. This can be very cathartic and healing.


  1. Remember forgiveness doesn’t make it right or make it okay that the offense happened. Trying looking at it from the other person’s eyes. Maybe they are in need of practicing forgiveness of someone or something and are stuck in the negative energy of being unforgiving. To practice empathy and compassion is healing for our body and mind.


In the last few days before Christmas, consider if you can give this gift to someone in your life. It won’t cost money, need to be gift wrapped or physically given. All it requires is for you to let go of negative feelings and be a better version of yourself. 

Spread the Word!

Treves Janszen

Treves Janszen

Nutrition Coach at Thrive Fitness
Treves is a Level 1 Certified Nutrition Coach through Precision Nutrition. She has been involved with fitness & nutrition for almost 10 years. Along with being a Nutrition Coach, Treves has 30+ years of healthcare experience as a Registered Nurse. In her spare time, Treves like to read, cook and lay by the pool (when it's sunny, of course!).
Treves Janszen